Bring On The Bacon

Saturday night is a night made for going out. You get all dolled up, down a few drinks, and prepare to howl at the moon until the sun rises. You also brush your teeth with a bottle of Jack. Or at least that’s what the pop songs tell us Saturday evenings are all about. It’s a wholesome time, really.

Apparently my life is not a music video. In fact, according to the collected lyrics of a million past top-40 hits, I am so far from Saturday night stereotypes I think I’d be classified an “oldie.”

For me, a successful Saturday entails pajamas, popcorn, and too much television with my boyfriend or a few close lady loves. I brush my teeth, too. with toothpaste.

I am not much of a party-goer. Chris and I just don’t love loud crowds, small spaces, and awkward small talk. We also don’t love to get our drink on, as the rap songs dub it. I prefer a nice cold sparkling water and Chris is all about the o.j. We’ve got nothing against the more rambunctious ones of our age group, just don’t expect us to be right there with them. If you can’t beat them, give up, or so I like to say. 

But, when our dearest friend, Beth, invited us to a bacon themed party this Saturday night, we had to re-evaluate our priorities. As much fun as marathons of The Wire are, how could I, resident foodie and lover of all things edible, and Chris, bacon fanatic, turn down a gala this appealing? We had been considering trying new things more frequently too, not letting our youth pass us by, all of that good stuff. This party seemed like the perfect opportunity to kick it into high gear, to put the best foot forward and embrace the night. Our answer was “YES!”

As a vegetarian, the food offerings at his party were a bit limited, but I respected the commitment to the theme and the sheer creativity showcased. Each guest was asked to bring a bacon-centric dish to share. Guests were then invited to ferry through the ample buffet spread, tasting the array of dishes and taking note on particularly delectable offerings. At the end of the night, ballots were passed around in which attendees voted for their favorite bacon creation. The winner received major bragging rights and some fun bacon-inspired original artwork by one of the hosts. Though we left before the official vote, I overheard various people discussing their opinions and I am convinced this was a close race.

Below is a list of a few notable bacon contenders:

bacon wrapped clementine with bacon creme fraiche

bacon walnut maple cookies

turkey bacon covered chocolate banana bites

bacon smores

nutella fried bacon

bacon brownies

bacon cheddar loaf

pb bacon sandwiches

bacon deviled eggs

bacon wrappped chocolate dipped butter fingers

bacon infused brussel sprouts

bacon paella

It was a regular pork smorgasboard!

Chris and I left smelling of fried pig and full of laughter. We may have snagged an artisan jello shot (made by one of the hosts of the shindig who specializes in kooky but delicious vodka-infused jello creation) and a few gum balls on the way out. The subway ride home was crowded with night owls making their way to their respective destination #1’s. I’m pretty sure I heard one kid nearby on the train comment on the eau of bacon in the car. Hey kid, that was me, the proud porker next to you. What of it?

We woke up sunday with head-aches. The smell of bacon wasn’t as funny this morning as it was last night.

Advil and spinach smoothies= indicator of a bacon party success.


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